Forget ‘Mature Student’. Discard ‘Happy Goth’. Even ‘Honest
Banker’ fades into insignificance when compared to my two newly discovered
oxymorons:
·
A Good Tobacco Company:
Today I travelled to a Central European country which, for confidentiality
reasons, I am not allowed to name, to visit a company that I must keep secret
lest an army of lawyers descend upon me. Suffice to say that they currently are
in the nicotine delivery business (cue pantomime boos). However they are an
honest and upfront organisation, acknowledging that their core produce causes
harm to its users, but they aspire to evolve. They have identified a range of
environmentally-sound business ventures that they want to move into. Water is a
key part of this new platform. They have the finances, attitude and ambition to
make an impact. I hope they are successful.
·
A Hairy Piers: I attended
the above meeting with my good friend Thierry Noel from Amane. Thierry has an
air of Gallic dishevelment that only a true Frenchman could pull off. Even his
best friends would describe him as resembling an unkempt mop. He has thick
luscious locks that remind you of an opulent lion’s mane. I on the other hand
look like a bald eagle. To further confirm his hirsuteness Thierry was
sporting a rugged 5-day-old beard. This led our host to comment that I, by
comparison, was ‘tightly shaved’. I chose to take this as a compliment,
politely ignoring the look in her eyes that asked how someone who clearly
hadn’t yet hit puberty could be quite so bald.
I decided it was best not to tell her that due to the
5am start I hadn’t actually shaved for 24 hours. This was my afternoon-shadow
look.
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