Deep in the heart of London is
Europe’s tallest building, The Shard. At the base of The Shard is the Shangri
La hotel. Hidden inside the hotel is Lang’s Café. So far, there is nothing
remarkable to this story. But this café is magical. Like a Lewis Carol portal at
the back of a cupboard, this café has the ability to enhance the lives of those
patrons who, through accident or good fortune, notice its hidden mystery. For
hard though it is to believe, the serving desk in the Lang’s café is made
of gingerbread.
Don’t believe me? See the
attached photos. That 12 foot high brickwork is all pure, edible, fresh
gingerbread. Most patrons fail to notice, but to those that do, great things
happen. Take my story as an example and then, I dare you, try
it for yourself.
Mere minutes after I had noticed
the gingerbread (and had an enlightening exchange with my server about the
various merits of such a workspace) I found myself facing a call of nature. I
visited the café toilet and experienced the unexpected but surprisingly wondrous
pleasure of a heated toilet seat. As I placed my delicate white buttocks
on the pre-warmed ceramic I knew my life was about to change. I could feel an
enchanted tingle creeping up my body. Something good was about to happen, I
just knew it.
Seconds later my phone buzzed,
announcing the arrival of a new email. It was from Frank Rogalla at Aqualia. It
was in Spanish but I could tell it was good news. A quick translation
later and I learnt that after almost 2 years in the evaluation process our Horizon
2020 consortium (comprising 18 different organisations from across the EU, with
Isle as the only UK partner) had been successful. We had secured a Euro7m
grant, spread over the 3 years, to investigate ‘Nanomaterials – Low Energy
Desalination’. This is a great project, working as part of a great team.
It is an early Christmas gift,
coupled with a little bit of fairy-tale luck perhaps. Some might call it
chance. Some might call it coincidence. I believe in the magic toilet.
As my day progressed it so did
my feelings of good fortune. As chance would have it, this evening was the Isle
UK Christmas Party. Admittedly an evening of virtual reality golf, speedway
racing and unbridled drunken karaoke with complete strangers is not the
traditional way to celebrate the birth of Christ, but it seemed strangely
fitting. We bonded and celebrated. I didn’t share my magic toilet seat story,
no one would have believed me. No one in Isle reads these Notes, they get
enough drivel from me as part of their day job that I suspect they all press
delete as soon as these emails arrive. My secret is safe.
So here I am, sitting on my
train home as it limps slowly across the Surrey countryside. A little bit drunk
and horse from singing, yet unbelievably happy. It is a Christmas Fairy-tale!
And there is still 10 days to go….
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