When I worked at Thames Water there was a running joke
that I bore a passing resemblance with the actor Woody Harrelson (see attached
photos). While I agree there is a slight likeness, I assumed the joke had become
exaggerated for effect; I didn’t really look like him.
Last week however, on the top of a French Alp, a complete
stranger mistook me for the great man. Bearing in mind he is 8 years older than
me I found this mildly offensive. As I politely admitted that I was just plain
old me, my brother helpfully pointed out that my Woody-likeness was with ‘his
fat balding Zombie Land career-low stage’, rather than when he was slim and
handsome.
In most of his roles Woody tends to play the deranged
psychotic madman. That’s not me, surely? I wanted to find whether we had any
other similarities. Wikipedia tells me that, aside from being an accomplished
TV, theatre and film actor he is an advocate for the legalisation of cannabis. I
can’t recall when I last took even an Asprin. His father was a hit man and died
in prison. My father was a research analyst and is still very much alive. The
hunt for lifestyle kinship was not looking good.
And then I read that he recently topped pole for The
Sexiest Vegan. One of my (many) New Year’s resolutions is to only eat meat twice
a week. Ok, so it’s not the full vegan thing, but I finally feel we have an
affinity. I can build on this. (I am also greatly reassured that at least the
vegan-community find white, balding, middle-aged blokes
attractive!)
Getting ribbed by colleagues is one thing, having
foreigners approach you in the mistaken belief that you are an Emmy Award winner
is quite another. It got me thinking, there has to be an opportunity
here…
Following an (extensive, all-consuming) internet search of
Lookalike Agencies I can confidently state there is a dearth in the supply of
Woody H doppelgangers. There are countless Prince Williams and Tom Cruises, but
I couldn’t find a single Woody. Something tells me 2015 could be my breakthrough
year.
Happy New Year. Have a great 2015.
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