No 166: Poster Boy

My face has been used fairly widely over the past few weeks to advertise Utility Week. I have lost track of the number of times people have come up to me and said that my grinning mug has appeared on their internet feed. I can only assume that earlier this year someone in a dark basement at the publishing firm Faversham House decided that my face was the perfect image to epitomise the water sector: a balding, middle aged, male looking ever-so-slightly smug. That, they no doubt confidently told themselves, that is the face of the UK water industry today.

I am of course delighted to be the Utility Week poster boy. It is a great event, and was held at Birmingham NEC earlier this week, in a space about the size of 10 football pitches. I estimate 10,000 people attended. The real game changer that made Utility Week 2017 stand head and shoulders above others were the multiple parallel conference sessions, all held on the main expo floor. This made it incredibly easy for the delegates to flex between different sessions/the expo, enhancing the whole experience for both attendees and presenters. To avoid unnecessary noise the delegates had headphones which meant they could lock into the conference speaker of their choice.

Aside from the fact that most of the attendees were over 35 and dressed in suits, it gave the conference the feel of a headphone disco at an open air festival after the noise curfew. (When I was presenting I definitely saw some of my audience rocking back and forth in their chairs.)

Perhaps the strangest person to comment on my image appearing in their internet feed was a friend at my local church. He works in the prison sector and has nothing to do with water. Upon learning that my friend had been targeted I wondered if Mr Google had got a sneaky insight into my religious beliefs and had decided to target similarly minded individuals. Realising this was unlikely I wondered instead if my recent driving ban (one month to go now!) had put me on an HMRC watch list.

I finally realised that the more likely explanation was that he was targeted because we had emailed in the past and Google never forgets a link. I am now hoping I will get adverts to attend exciting conferences in the prison sector. If they are going to use our data then this really should be a two way street.  

Once you get past the fact that I look like I am supressing flatulence it is actually quite a nice photo. My wife likes it,  but that is possibly because I don’t normally supress wind in her presence. She is used to the full, glorious, unedited Piers experience. Lucky lady. 

No 165: Wet, Windy and Wild: The secret of a good corporate retreat

It is not unusual for big companies to invest significant time and money bringing their senior teams together once or twice a year so they can bond and discuss company strategy. Isle Group (www.isleutilities.com ), the company for which I am Chairman, is no different. Our senior team is spread across the world from Australia to California, Abu Dhabi to London. Being relatively small (at just 50 people) we lack the budget some companies might have for this exercise, but I like to think we more than make up for it in imagination. We can’t afford 3 days in a posh hotel in a prime holiday location. For us it is 3 days bundled together, sharing rooms and toilets and all our associated personal functions, in a big house in the English coastal town of Southwold. Situated on the Suffolk coastline, with the foreboding North Sea and the chill east winds, I like to think the team bond through shared adversity. Forget luxury. Hardship is the glue that truly binds.

Throughout this week the President of ‘Isle America’, Cristina Ahmadpour, who is used to the sandy beaches of San Diego and the pristine, gloriously warm waters of the Pacific has resolutely refused to even dip her toe in the freezing grey North Sea. Yesterday evening however, following a mix of coaxing and cajoling from myself and our CFO we persuaded her to give it a go. I think the offer to bump up her flight back home from a seat at the very back of the plane to one that was near the very back of the plane was probably the deciding factor.

The rule was she had to fully immerse. See attached 30 second video link. I particularly like Cristina’s impressive face plant and her accompanying Californian squeal. Note also the perfect synchronization as Ryan (our CFO) and I enter the water. We were channelling Tom Daley and Daniel Goodfellow, Ryan especially so with his exceptionally small budgie smugglers.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B-kNR9H2w43gOHpYWXM2UWFxTGc/view?usp=sharing

Why do something one once, when there is the perfect opportunity to do it twice? Especially if you can bring in all your friends. As the evening progressed and the wine flowed, the team bonded and at midnight a second dip, this time without the protection of a wet suit, seemed a good idea. Midnight is clearly not the best time for decision making in the Isle family.

It is only now, as I look at the photos, that I see that our MD for Europe, Dutchman Dr Ignaz Worm, appears to have been so whipped up by the enthusiasm that he didn’t let the fact he lacked swimming trunks deter him. Underpants are just as functional. Now that’s impressive team bonding. Beat that IBM and Google!

Fun fact: Someone in the Isle senior team has the copyright symbol, ©, tattooed on the upper cheek of their left buttock. It looks like they have been stamped for the Congestion Charge. Bless.

Cristina - BEFORE THE SWIM

Cristina - AFTER THE SWIM

BEFORE THE MIDNIGHT DIP

AFTER THE MIDNIGHT DIP

No 164: My Ego is like a Tom Cat

Sometimes it sits quietly purring in a corner of my life. Sometimes it endearingly rubs itself up on the legs of people I encounter in a valiant attempt to get stroked. Sometimes it voraciously demands to be fed, meowing incessantly. It is therefore rather wondrous when someone bolsters ones ego without any provocation. It is the equivalent to a kindly old lady stopping on her way to the shops to give 2 minutes of unwarranted love to the smelly Tom Cat sitting on a neighbours garden wall. The cat can’t believe his luck, but he laps up all the love as if he actually had done something to deserve it (he never has).

I had such a moment earlier this week. I received a call from an engineering student at Leeds University, Josh Maillings. Josh had been recommended to speak to me in my capacity as a ‘water expert’. My inner Tom Cat positively bristled with pride. Josh is writing a dissertation on the effects of Brexit on innovation in the UK water sector. Years of being a professional consultant have taught me that for every technical question there are always three responses and I wasn’t about to deviate from this universal truth. I dug deep and gave my three responses.  

•          Firstly, the weakening of the £ was likely to mean costs will rise since a significant proportion of the water supply chain is procured from overseas. This is good for innovation since increased pressure to reduce costs inevitably moves an organisation’s risk appetite upwards. Upon reflection I now realise that this answer is not particularly helpful. I didn’t actually answer the question. The weakening of the £ may be partly due to Brexit, but it is probably more influenced by activities in the US. For failing to answer the exam question I deserve a mere 2/10 for my response. [Interestingly, the smart money (apparently) says that if Mr Trump follows through on his infrastructure investment promises by, for example, building a 100ft high garden wall to keep out the neighbours, then the £ will drop even further. Alternatively if he decides to start WWIII then the whole topic is mute since we will have other more pressing things to worry about than a bit of FX loss.]
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•         Secondly, Brexit is likely to lead to the rejection (or at least the watering down) of various EU environmental legislation. This will remove one of the key drivers behind many environmental ‘technology advancement’ programmes. This is obviously bad for innovation. Unfortunately I now realise I may be wrong with this conclusion also. Perhaps the UK will use Brexit to adopt even more stringent levels of environmental protection. This appears unlikely, but I do remain optimistically hopeful that, irrespective of the legislative changes, water companies will not weaken in their resolve to make the right decisions about protecting and preserving their local environment. Call me naïve but I believe we are still an industry dominated by good people who care deeply about preserving our natural resources. Mostly.  
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•          Thirdly, no discussion around Brexit can avoid the topic of immigration. The water sector relies significantly on overseas workers, in particular for blue/grey collar activities (plumbers, leakage technicians).  As we tighten our immigration rules, this resource pool will reduce, increased demand will push up salaries, which in turn will drive a desire for increased automation. This is good for innovation. Yet again on reflection I realise this conclusion is oversimplified and probably wrong. Our dependence on overseas workers is not just restricted to the blue/grey collar activities. I struggle to think of a single strong competent technical team, in particular in R&D, that does not rely upon a diverse multinational team. Some of those overseas brains are startlingly good. Without them we will have lost something rather special.

Regular readers of this blog (both of them) can attest to the insatiable nature of my ego, and therefore will appreciate my desire to reach out for more informed perspectives on the whole Brexit/Water/Innovation conundrum. I will share any responses to this blog with Josh, taking just a little bit of credit for having provided the communication channel. See it as a friendly scratching of my feline ego chin. Or if the fancy takes you, see it as a chance to let your own personal Tom Cat get some satisfaction, while at the same time helping a hard working student in Leeds.

Just remember though, Tom Cats can be difficult to manage. They roam unrestrained over territories that are not their own, they are astonishing indiscriminate in their hunt for gratification, and every now and then they do something that requires someone else to do the cleaning up. Tom Cats are not ideal pets. Treat yours carefully.

 This blog, and previous editions, can be found at http://notesfrompiers.blogspot.co.uk/

No 163: Euthanize the Old, Brainwash the Young

Last Tuesday I attended a meeting in the Philippines hosted by Metropac Water and Maynilad (one of the Philippine’s major water suppliers). Also attending were a number of senior managers from a variety of rural Philippine Water Districts.

For some attendees it was the first time they had met. As an ice-breaker we were all invited to share something that our colleagues didn’t know. All was going smoothly (‘I like to dance’, ‘I have a pet hamster’) until a lovely lady with a larger-than-usual body shape stood up and said with heart-breaking melancholy  ‘One of the things my colleagues don’t know about me is that I used to be sexy’.

This jaw-dropping confession was then followed by a man who stood up and declared ‘Some of my colleagues think I am a homosexual. I am not. ….. Just kidding. Yes I am!’.

My confession that I grow asparagus in my spare time felt rather lame.

The aim of the meeting was to discuss how they could better identify and adopt new technology. It is a problem common to all utilities irrespective of size, location or wealth. Two of my favourite suggestions were that we should Euthanize the Old, and Brainwash the Young. As innovation adoption strategies go, these are more edgy than usual.

The euthanization suggestion was actually made by the eldest person in the room (I don’t think he was volunteering) as a tongue-in-cheek alternative to the problem all utilities experience of having operators who are so set in their ways that they actively resist new innovations. The brainwashing suggestion was another tongue-in-cheek proposal that came out of a discussion about the importance of educating children on how water is treated and cleaned. I also learnt about a newly created organisation called the Philippine Young Water Professionals. This was formed by 5 very engaging (and very engaged) young people in Manila who decided that the best way to make things better was get on and do it themselves. It is a very impressive, and very Philippine, approach.

Also worth noting that within 2 minutes of the official meeting ending there was karaoke playing loudly, with words on the overhead projector and microphones in the hands of enthusiastic (and talented) singers.

For the record, this confess-at-the-start-and-sing-for-joy-at-the-end approach is not how meetings tend to go in London. I like the Philippine style more.

No 162: The most fun you can have with two bananas

When I was young a ‘Blue Wave’ was a particular type of old ladies hair style. Perhaps it was more common in the 1980’s but elderly ladies in the twilight of their years would add (quite literally) a bit of colour to their lives by transforming their greying locks into something more vibrant and eye-catching. Quite why they would select a shade of blue that made them look as if they had been dunked headfirst into a public urinal was always a point of fascination for me. However, that was then, this is now. Today a Blue Wave describes one of the most exciting, game-changing and altruistic ventures in the water sector.

It is the brainchild of George Hawkins, the General Manager for DC Water and Sewer Authority based in Washington DC. George is well-known in the water sector, being something of a visionary. I confess to having just a little professional man-crush. His premise is simple: there are two types of water agency and there is a divide between them that needs to be closed. First there are the large entities, such as DC Water. These entities typically serve cities and employ diverse teams of engineers, operators, scientists and hydrogeologists. These organisations have a depth of professional capability which enables them to identify, scope and deliver the constant stream of projects which a modern utility needs to undertake if they are to provide a safe and reliable service to their customers.  At the other extreme there are the smaller municipalities. These entities might only serve a small town or village, they employ equally committed and passionate staff but these staff are in a constant battle just to stand still. Some of these entities employ just one person, who does everything from operations to billing. Money is tight for both the large and small entities, but the small entities are doubly constrained because they lack the resources necessary to identify and develop improvement projects. The staff in these smaller entities are running so hard just to stand still that they will never access the exciting new technological advances that could break the cycle of madness. While the bigger organisations power forward, embracing new technology and achieving enhanced efficiencies, the smaller entities just drop further and further behind.

What makes this challenge particularly pertinent is that the number of these smaller entities far, far outweighs the larger. Of the 56,000 municipalities in the US, probably 55,000 fall into this latter category. And this is not a US-specific problem. Many countries face a similar challenge. There are literally millions of people around the world who are disadvantaged due to their local water utility’s inability to embrace new tech.

Blue Wave will address this problem. Using new digital advances it will provide a mechanism that helps the smaller entities claw their way out of their endless cycle of running to stand still. To work effectively Blue Wave will require some of the larger utilities to share their knowledge and experience, but the appetite to do so appears to be growing. The Blue Wave initiative was a key topic for discussion at an invite-only event held yesterday in Las Vegas for a small intimate group of US water leaders. I attended as the token foreigner, coming from one of the few countries that has not yet been blacklisted by the kindly and diplomatic new tenants in in Pennsylvania Avenue.

The event was organised by the water-focused private equity fund XPV and sponsored by Wells Fargo. Their thinking was to put some of the nation’s most experienced and informed leaders in a room, throw in a few sector-scale challenges, and then sit back and see what happens. Based on yesterday’s meeting, Blue Wave is what happens. In a world where intolerance and self-protection is on a relentless and seemingly unstoppable rise it is reassuring that something like Blue Wave is getting traction. The water sector needs this. The world needs this.

And the reference to bananas in this blog title? Well, after a hard day putting the world to rights the delegates at yesterday’s event were invited to attend the One Night for One Drop Cirque du Soleil show. This is an annual charity event held in aid of water and sanitation initiatives and is a 3 hour extravaganza showcasing feats so awe-inspiring they beggar belief. It was a collection of acts that ranged from the terrifyingly dangerous (e.g. trapeze artists 100ft above the stage with nothing to stop their fall other than a rope held between their teeth) to the astonishingly bizarre (William Shatner closed the show with an environmental rights song so jaw-droppingly awful I can only assume it was ironic….but does Las Vegas do irony?).

My hands-down favourite act of the night however was a husband and wife comedy duo which involved nothing more than 2 bananas. Like all good Las Vegas shows it managed to be shocking, hilarious, repulsive, mesmerising and nutritious all at the same time. It even involved an exchange of bodily fluids (between performers and a member of the audience) which is something not often seen live on stage, even in Las Vegas. Best of all it was just the sort of thing any loving couple could happily do in the comfort of their own home, if they were so minded.

Sadly I no longer have space to share further details on this incredible act.  And anyway, to share the details here would be to break a golden rule: What happens in Vegas…

This blog and past entries can be found at http://notesfrompiers.blogspot.co.uk/